My Own Eyes Lyrics - Mandatory Fun - Weird Al Yankovic

I saw a baby drive a truck 

I saw a junkie eat a tuba 

I saw a stripper kiss a duck 

Behind a dumpster in Aruba 

I saw this fat, psychotic guy 

His underwear was made of crickets 

He pawned a skeleton to buy 

Some old expired lotto tickets 

I saw a naked vagrant giving 

Mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to his cat 

I probably could have gone my whole life 

Without seeing that 

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With My Own Eyes 

I see things that'd drive a normal man insane 

Wish I could disconnect my brain 

From My Own Eyes 

I saw a mime get hacked to death 

With an imaginary cleaver 

I saw an old man's final breath 

I watched him die from Bieber Fever 

I saw these diabetic chicks 

In an abandoned 7-Eleven 

I watched them snorting pixie sticks 

While they were belching Stairway To Heaven 

I saw two drag queens trying to see how many crackers 

They could shove up each other's nose 

I'd like to erase my mind completely but I suppose 

That's just the way it goes 

Photos 

With My Own Eyes 

I see things that'd drive a normal man insane 

Wish I could disconnect my brain 

From My Own Eyes (My Own Eyes) 

Those visions haunt my memory 

Oh, there's so much I wish I could unsee 

With My Own Eyes 

Some priest got drunk and stole a circus zebra 

And he trained it to massage his back 

My guinea pig committed hara-kiri 

So we used him to play hacky-sack 

My neighbor's kids sold weapons-grade plutonium 

And frosty ice-cold lemonade 

They took MasterCard and sometimes 

Human organs in trade, that's how we paid 

I have to say that it was really darn good lemonade 

With My Own Eyes 

I've seen thing that'd drive a normal man insane 

Wish I could disconnect my brain 

From My Own Eyes (My Own Eyes) 

Those visions haunt my memory 

Oh, there's so much I wish I could unsee 

With My Own Eyes 

With My Own Eyes 

With My Own Eyes 

With My Own Eyes