Don't Ask Lyrics - Singles - Eric Schwartz

Maybe some day Ill decide to stop thinking 

Get a job and achieve the approval of my neighbors 

Buy myself a beemer and a condo out in Vail 

Send my boys off to college if I can keep them out of jail 

Maybe then Ill winter down Florida 

Make myself a melanoma yarmulke, take lots of short walks 

Eat prunes fear salt wear plaid drive slow 

And take herbal tea with my early bird special 

Pray that my memory lasts as long as me 

And sit around the sauna counting varicose vessels 

CHORUS 

Dont ask me what Im doing 

Dont ask me why Im doing it 

Ill do what I wanna do (x4) 

Maybe some day I should learn about god, 

Buy the book rent the flick hell anything tell me why 

The first thing they did was put an izmeil* to my dick 

Snippy snip mazel tov hey really makes me want to pray 

Build me an ashram up in Waltham, 

Decorate a warehouse and meditate on toe-jam 

Dow Zen Krishna Buddha anything at all to help me 

Ease the woulda coulda shoulda blues 

Pardon my expression but its kinda hard not to laugh 

At anybody wearing those shoes 

CHORUS 

Maybe someday I could find myself a girl 

With a really long fuse and a forgiving sense of humor 

She wouldnt have to clean unless 

She couldnt stand the normal mess 

That piles up around me inexplicably 

Find ourselves a preacher rent ourselves a hall 

Tie the knot go home put the pre-nup on the wall 

Get down to the task of putting up with each other 

Til the war becomes worse than the prospect of divorce 

If this interests anyone, see me when the shows done 

With this caveat...I tend to sweat a lot 

CHORUS