It's A Broad Lic Nic Lyrics - Singles - Doug Anthony All Stars

And I'll tell you while I'm able 

Or I'll smash your skull if you're not 

Drink enough Black label 

It's a hard mans drink 

And though the bottles broken 

Put your money on the table 

Strain the glass through your teeth 

So we grew up mean lean 

Kings of the street scene 

Without a mothers guiding hand 

To keep us clean 

Down your rum 

We'll take life as it comes 

And all you blue rinse critics 

Lick our literary bums 

I drank my first pure malt 

Before I was three 

I smoked a pack of Dutch cigarettes 

My pappy left for me 

And I romanced a little lass 

Who was twelve years my elder 

At the age of six I held her 

That year I also bed her 

So before I was seven 

My first child was born 

I told a pack of filthy lies 

As a politician 

I heard my own confession 

As an act of contrition 

I spent ten years as a Trappist monk 

In a village in Tibet 

And I walked up Everest naked 

Just to win a bet 

Well I cut off my leg 

To win a one legged race 

And when I won, I stitched it 

on my little sister's stomach 

I've fought Mohammed Ali 

I've seduced Mata Hari 

I've even worn a sari 

When I impersonated Ghandi 

And I dare any man here 

To call me a liar 

(Liar!) 

But I swear I've seen Ezekial 

I swear I've seen Isiah 

Toasting marshmellows 

In Beelzebub's fire 

And we're mad mad mad 

Dangerous to know 

We never give a tinkers cuss 

About the seeds we sow 

And we stay up late 

And never be forlorn 

And when the morning comes around 

We'll kiss the crack of dawn 

We took the whacks from Kerouac's 

And dusty Dostoyevsky's 

And when all was said and done 

Booze was all I had left me 

For all the worlds great thinkers 

Are all a looooaaaaaooooaaad of pus 

And if you ask us how Zarathustra spoke 

He spake thus, 

Drink drink drink 

Drink until you're drunk 

Drink until you can't stand up 

'til you're roly-poly stunk 

'til your bladder bursts 

'til you throw a fit to curse 

'til they lift you up still comatose 

And slamdance in the hearse 

We're good, good, bad, bad 

Ugly as sin 

We mix up cough syrup 

With our gin 

So take your medicine 

I pray that when I die 

There's someone else around 

To kiss my arse goodbye 

Yes, I pray, I pray, I pray that when I die 

There's someone else around to kiss my arse goodbye