Canadian Idiot Lyrics - Straight Outta Lynwood - Weird Al Yankovic

Don't want to be a Canadian idiot 

Don't want to be some beer swillin' hockey nut 

And do I look like some frostbitten hosehead? 

I never learned my alphabet from A to Zed 

They all live on donuts and moose meat 

And they leave the house without packin' heat 

Never even bring their guns to the mall 

And you know what else is too funny 

Their stupid monopoly money 

Can't take 'em seriously at all 

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Well maple syrup and snow's what they export 

They treat curling just like it's a real sport 

They think their silly accent is so cute 

Can't understand a thing they're talking aboot 

Sure they got their national health care 

Cheaper meds, low crime rates and clean air 

Then again well they got Celine Dion 

Eat their weight in Kraft macaroni 

And dream of driving a Zamboni 

All over Saskatchewan 

Don't want to be a Canadian idiot 

Won't figure out the temperature in Celsius 

See the map they're hovering right over us 

Tell you the truth it makes me kinda nervous 

Photos 

Always hear the same kind of story 

Break their nose and they'll just say sorry 

Tell me what kind of freaks are that polite? 

It's gotta mean they're all up to something 

So quick before they see it coming 

Time for a preemptive strike