Advice From A Divorced Gentleman To His Bachelor Friend Considering Marriage Lyrics - The Gay Parade - Of Montreal

You should stay away from roses 

And be careful to avoid 

chocolate hearts 

Keep distant from romantic notions 

Cause that's where love 

most often starts 

Be sure to steer clear of diamonds 

And mink coats are most certainly out too 

For if she goes in for that kind of thing 

Just might fall then what you will do 

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You know you've always been the sort 

Who's truly only fond of the sport 

And who will never be satisfied 

Reclining in slippers by the fireside 

With a wife's constant nagging 

for things that you can't provide 

Who no longer bears resemblance 

to that soft spoken flower 

You were so desperate to have for your bride 

Too much conversing with a woman 

tends to dull a man's wit 

Never be taken in by poets 

Who claim that love if it's pure will never fade 

Though love may last all right in a bibliotheque 

In the real world man its too easily unmade 

Photos 

So don't take your freedom for granted 

Don't let curiosity take you for a ride 

As years drag on when you wake up next to her 

You'll wish that in your sleep you had died 

You'll wish you had died