Can God Fill Teeth? Lyrics - The Last Temptation Of Reid - Lard

Don't ask me why 

But I was walking down the streets 

Of Fairfax, California 

And I saw this flyer hangin' 

On a telephone pole, and it said 

CAN GOD FILL TEETH? 

That's right! 

For a $10 "Donation" 

You could see silver fillings turn 

To gold and other "supernormal dental happenings." 

New caps! Filled cavities! Bring a 

Flashlight and a mirror to observe. 

But wait a minute - 

Didn't I just read 

About how the cops are getting parents 

To plant bugging devices 

In their kids teeth 

So if they disappear they can track 'em 

Before they wind up on the backs of milk cartons 

And all that - 

And didn't I read 

That these devices can go two-way 

And everything that I do or say 

Is all goin' on tape somewhere right now 

Planted in my cavities 

And they didn't even tell me 

No wonder every bad thing 

In and out of my mouth 

Keeps winding up on my employment record 

All those fillings 

All those crowns 

I'll show them 

Who's boss of my big mouth 

Where's the pliars 

God dammit! Where's the pliars?!? 

Wilma! Where'd you put my electric drill 

This is all coming out right now - TODAY! 

Agh! Agh! Agh! 

Agh! Agh! Agh! 

Agh! Agh! Agh! 

Must be some kind of conspiracy 

The whole world's a God damn conspiracy 

Look anywhere long enough, you're gonna find a conspiracy 

Man, LIFE is a conspiracy! 

Agh! Agh! Agh! 

Agh! Agh! Agh! 

Agh! Agh! Agh! 

Needlenose 

Up my nose 

- Agh! - 

Where did all these wires come from? 

How far up into my skull do they go? 

I pull out more and more copper spagetti 

How'd my Weekly World News get all wet? 

God damn fishsticks melted again 

What are they trying to do to me? 

No secrets left in the land of the free! 

There 

No one's gonna tell me what to do 

It's worth eating baby food 

The rest of my life 

To be a free man 

Bastards: 

Probably wouldn't understand me anyway.