Unnecessary Pain Lyrics - All Love Lost - Joe Budden

I still picture your affection 

I still hear you like we're talkin' on the phone 

I still feel it 

Like you're right there holdin' on to me 

But words cannot explain 

We will never be us again 

Everything has changed 

Or is that just you givin' up again? 

More unnecessary pain 

I would ask how we ended up here, but I drove 

And you allowed me 

Or maybe it's only me that remembers it 

'Cause you're so easily told about me 

But not once while we were on that road did you doubt me 

Played your position, writin' out our books 

I noticed a page missin', blame it on the age difference 

I see you in the club, now days you're resistant 

You used to get excited just to never pay admission 

Lookin' for the old you, wishin' shit was normal 

Tried to mold you and you ended up with it on you 

Live around the corner, yeah we ain't even formal 

So I'm askin' God, why you alive and I gotta mourn you 

Word, I see you got a little crew now 

A bunch of ugly broke bitches I know better than 

And I ain't tryna say them hoes usin' you 

Well actually who would I be kiddin'? Yes I am 

I see your life from far and something's off with it 

It's my fault and shit, I shoulda never altered it 

I sold a dream when you couldn't have known the cost of it 

Knew my love came with a pain and I still offered it 

Seein' your weight loss, knowin' I'm the cause of it 

If that ain't my signature, then shit, somebody forgin' it 

But you think I ain't hurt, like it ain't no guilt in me 

Like it ain't killin' me, I'm out here on a killin' spree 

A sickness, I ain't found a way to nurse it yet 

Like I ain't a nervous wreck, like it's no reverse effect 

Internal bleedin' and the cuts run deep 

Every time I leave one love, a loved one leaves 

I wish I could take the pain away, but only yours 

I'll be fine if I remain this way 

See I deserve whatever punishment I get 

You could sentence me to years 

Of hearin' my vic's voice even when nothin' is there 

I still picture your affection 

I still hear you like we're talkin' on the phone 

Still feel it 

Like you're right there holdin' on to me 

But words cannot explain 

We will never be us again 

Everything has changed 

Or is that just you givin' up again? 

More unnecessary pain 

I done gone so long not givin' a fuck 

That it's no longer erratic, now it's a normal habit 

Even when I go my way, I gotta have it 

Bury me with my sweats on and bitches in the casket 

All the waiters and words, I let 'em loom on 

Every verse real enough to write it on my tombstone 

And so you know how real that paranoia be 

Even make me think my demise is avoidin' me 

The sick part is I withstand that abuse 

Long as the fans are amused, am I a man or a muse? 

Never sugarcoat it when I hand it to the youth 

Fell from all over the world, and always landed in the booth 

I hold music in such a high regard that 

To this day I still feel like it's destiny 

And to these fans that I once gave my life for 

I gotta tell you that it's not much left in me 

Yeah, and not that it's growin' old 

But years of bearin' my soul is takin' it's toll 

Took a father from his son, but is it best that way? 

I'm so fucked up inside I can't regret that Trey 

Hold my head up high at the gates after my time's up 

They say you saved somebody's life by givin' mine up 

Wouldn't be the first time that I went without 

Chased my true love so much that I resent it now 

You can put this in the scriptures like it's sacred 

To live with it, but hate it is to giveth then to take it 

Goin' through the motions, it'll strip a nigga naked 

I guess it's for a cause if all the kids are gonna play it 

Trust me, I ain't been the same yet 

You'll stop and stare any time you see a trainwreck 

And I'll take whatever punishment they give 

You can sentence me to years 

Of hearin' that fan's voice even when nothin' is there 

I still picture your affection 

I still hear you like we're talkin' on the phone 

Still feel it 

Like you're right there holdin' on to me 

But words cannot explain 

We will never be us again 

Everything has changed 

Or is that just you givin' up again? 

More unnecessary pain 

Still learnin' to live with 

People coming in and out my life 

The ones who matter show it over time 

That's why they always stay on my mind 

So I live in reality 

Nobody else matters to me but you, you, you 

Why try to hide the truth? 

I still picture your affection 

I still hear you like we're talkin' on the phone 

Still feel it 

Like you're right there holdin' on to me 

But words cannot explain 

We will never be us again 

Everything has changed 

Or is that just you givin' up again? 

More unnecessary pain 

I'm tried of feeling this 

I gotta live with this