The Illinois Enema Bandit Lyrics - Fz:oz - Frank Zappa

Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals) 

Ray White (rhythm guitar, vocals) 

Eddie Jobson (keyboards, violin, vocals) 

Patrick O'Hearn (bass, vocals) 

Terry Bozzio (drums, vocals) 

Ruth Underwood (percussion, synthesizer) 

Don Pardo (vocals) 

David Samuels (vibes) 

Randy Brecker (trumpet) 

Mike Brecker (tenor saxophone, flute) 

Lou Marini (alto saxophone, flute) 

Ronnie Cuber (baritone saxophone, clarinet) 

Tom Malone (trombone, trumpet, piccolo) 

John Bergamo (percussion over-dub) 

Ed Mann (percussion over-dub) 

Louanne Neil (osmotic harp over-dub) 

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And now folks it's time for Don Pardo To deliver our special Illinois Enema Bandit-type announcement Take it away, Don 

"This is a true story 

About a famous criminal 

From right around Chicago 

This is the story of Michael Kenyon 

A man who's serving time at this very moment 

For the crime of armed robbery 

It so happened, that at the time of the robbery 

Michael, decided to give his female victims 

A little enema 

Apparently, there was no law against that 

But his name lives on 

Michael Kenyon 

THE ILLINOIS ENEMA BANDIT!" 

Photos 

The Illinois Enema Bandit 

I heard he's on the loose 

I heard he's on the loose 

Lord, the pitiful screams 

Of all them college-educated women... 

Boy, he'd just be tyin' 'em up 

(They'd be all bound down!) 

Just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla 

The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice 

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag 

fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice 

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag 

fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice 

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag 

fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice 

The Illinois Enema Bandit 

I heard it on the news 

I heard it on the news 

Bloomington Illinois... he has caused some alarm 

Just sneakin' around there 

From farm to farm 

Got a rubberized bag 

And a hose on his arm 

Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump 

That he just might wanna pump 

Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump 

That he just might wanna pump 

Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump 

That he just might wanna pump 

The Illinois Enema Bandit 

One day he'll have to pay 

One day he'll have to pay 

The police will say, "You're under arrest!" 

And the judge would have him for a special guest 

The D.A. will order a secret test 

And stuff his pudgy little thumbs in the side of his vest 

Then they'll put out a call for the jury folks 

And the judge would say, "No poo-poo jokes!" 

Then they'll drag in the bandit for all to see, 

Sayin' "Don't nobody have no sympathy... 

HOT SOAP WATER in the FIRST DEGREE!" 

And then the bandit might say, "Why is everybody looking' at me?" 

WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY? 

WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS KINDA MISERY? 

WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY? 

Now, one girl shout: "Let the Bandit be!" 

BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY? 

BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY? TELL ME NOW, WHAT'S 

YOUR PLEA? 

Another girl shout: "Let the fiend go free!" 

ARE YOU GUILTY? BANDIT, DID YOU DO THESE DEEDS? 

The Bandit say, "It must be just what they all needs..." 

"It must be just what they all needs..." 

"It must be just what they all needs..." 

"It must be just what they all needs..." 

"It must be just what they all needs..." 

"It must be just what they all needs..." 

etc. repeat 

Wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna enema 

Enema 

repeat...