The Evil Prince Lyrics - You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore Vol. 4 - Frank Zappa

Frank Zappa (lead guitar) 

Ike Willis (guitar, vocals) 

Ray White (guitar, lead vocals) 

Bobby Martin (keyboards, saxophone, vocals) 

Alan Zavod (keyboards) 

Scott Thunes (bass) 

Chad Wackerman (drums) 

Well well well, now, dis de nasty sucker dat be respondable fo de enwhiffment o de origumal potium. Now in his infinate respondable party personage as de Evil Prince and through de magik o stage-kraft of course, wes about to see what gwine on in his magikal conjurance up of his little cauldrom of doom! Now check it on out now 

Somewhere, over there, I can tell, 

I guess so 

Theres the voice of 

A potato-headed whatchamacallit 

Whoo, do tell! 

Who does not wish me well! 

His clothes are quite stupid, 

And also his shoes! 

Ain't no bussiness like show business 

He's got a big ol duck-mouth! 

Who knows how he chews! 

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He thinks he knows something 

About THE GREAT PLAN! 

How ULTIMATE BLANDNESS 

Must RULE and COMMAND 

He knows not a drop, 

Not a crumb, 

Not a whit, 

Of the reason for doing 

This criminal shit 

And then, if he did, 

Would it matter a bit? 

Not at all! 

Because IT IS WRIT: 

Our BEIGE-BLANDISH GOD 

Tends to CERTIFY IT: 

Photos 

Only the boring and bland shall survive! 

Only the lamest of lameness will thrive! 

Take it or leave it, you wont be alive, 

If you are overtly CREATIVE! 

Fairies and faggots and queers are 

CREATIVE 

All the best music on Broadway is 

NATIVE 

Who will step forward 

And end all this trouble? 

For beige-blandish citizens, 

Clutching the rubble 

Of vanishing dreams 

Of wimpish amusement, 

Replaced by a rash 

Of CREATIVE confusement! 

Soon, my brave Zombies, 

Youll make your return! 

Broadway will glow! 

Broadway will burn! 

(Along with the remnants of 

EVERYTHING NEW) 

My HOLY DISEASE will do 

Wonders for you! 

Those lovely producers 

Who paid for you then 

Will do it again, and again, and again! 

The spying potato 

The spying potato 

With horrible diction 

And terrible diction 

Will rot in the garbage 

I can smell it right now 

When this shows eviction 

Takes place shortly after 

My alternate skill 

Of THEATRICAL SABOTAGE 

Triumphs YOUR will! 

I've a special review 

Yes I know you really do! 

I've been saving for years 

Yes I know you really have 

For a show just like this, 

For a really stupid show 

With POTATOES and QUEERS 

I'll say its disgusting, atrocious, and dull 

I'll say it makes boils inside of your skull 

I'll say its the worst -of-the-worst of the year, 

No wind down the plain, and its hard on your ear 

I'll say its the work of an infantile mind 

I'll say that its tasteless, and that you will find 

A better excuse to spend money or time 

At a Tupper-Ware Party, wee-oo 

So, do be a smarty! 

Oo-oo-wee-oo 

Hold on to that dollar 

A little while longer 

For spending it here, 

Why, it couldnt be wronger! 

WHATS HAPPENED TO BROADWAY? 

WHERES IT GONE, ALL THE GLITTER? 

THE HEART AND SOUL 

THE PATTER? 

THE PITTER? 

And after this deadly review hits the paper, 

In will come ROPER, BENDER & RAPER, 

To legally execute all that remains 

Of this tragic amusement for drug-addled brains 

Drug-addled brains, drug addled brains 

(solo) 

Hold on to that g-string 

A little while longer 

For spending it here, 

Why, it couldnt be wronger! 

WHATS HAPPENED TO BROADWAY? 

WHERES IT GONE, ALL THE GLITTER? 

THE HEART AND SOUL 

THE PATTER? 

THE PITTER? 

And after this deadly review hits the paper, 

In will come ROPER, BENDER & RAPER, 

To legally execute all that remains 

Of this tragic amusement for drug-addled brains 

Hey hey, hey hey, hey hey, brai-hains . . .