Eminem- Lyrics - Wrestling

Into 

May I have your attention please? 

May I have your attention please? 

Will the real Slim Shady please stand up? 

I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up? 

We're gonna have a problem here 

Y'all act like ya never seen a white person before 

Jaws all on the floor like Pam, like Tommy just burst in the door 

And started whooping her ass worse than before 

They first were divorce, throwin' her over furniture (Ahh!) 

It's the return of the..."Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding, 

he just didn't say what I think he did, did he?" 

And Dr. Dre said... 

Nothing you idiots! Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement!(Ha-ha!) 

Feminist women love Eminem 

Slim Shady, I'm sick of him 

Look at him, walking around grabbing his you-know-what 

Flipping the you-know-who, yeah, but he's so cute though 

Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose 

But no worse than what's going on in your parents' bedrooms 

Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't 

But it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose 

My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips 

And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss 

And that's the message that we deliver to little kids 

And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is 

Of course they gonna know what intercourse is 

By the time they hit fourth grade 

They got the Discovery Channel don't they? 

We ain't nothing but mammals 

Well, some of us cannibals 

Who cut other people open like cantaloupes 

But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes 

Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope 

But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote 

Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes 

Chorus: 

I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady 

All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating 

So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up? 

Please stand up, please stand up 

'cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady 

All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating 

So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up? 

Please stand up, please stand up 

Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell his records 

Well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too! 

You think I give a damn about a Grammy? 

Half of you critics can't even stomach me let alone stand me 

"But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?" 

Why? So you guys could just lie to get me here 

So you can sit me here next to Britney Spears 

Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs 

So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst 

And hear them argue over who she gave head to first 

You little bitch, put me on Blast on MTV 

"Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee" 

I should download her audio on MP3 

And show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD 

I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups 

All you do is annoy me so I have been sent here to destroy you 

And there's a million of us just like me 

Who cuss like me; who just don't give a fuck like me 

Who dress like me; walk, talk and act like me 

And just might be the next best thing but not quite me! 

Chorus 

I'm like a head trip to listen to 'cause I'm only giving you 

Things you joke about with your friends inside your living room 

The only difference is I got the balls to say it 

In front of y'all and I don't gotta be frost or sugar coated at all 

I just get on a mic and spit it and whether you like to admit it 

I just shitted better than 90 percent of you rappers out there 

Then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like valiums 

It's funny 'cause at the rate I'm going when I'm 30 

I'll be the only person in the nursing home flirting 

Pinching nurses asses when I'm jacking off with Jergens 

And I'm jerkin' but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working 

And every single person is a Slim Shady lurking 

He could be working at Burger King spitting on your onion rings 

Or in the parking lot, circling, screaming I don't give a fuck! 

With his windows down and his system up 

So, will the real Shady please stand up? 

And put one of those fingers on each hand up? 

And be proud to be outta ya mind and outta control 

And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go? 

Chorus 

Guess there's a Slim Shady in all of us 

Fuck it, let's all stand up