I'll Repair For You ( A Theme For Home Improvement ) Lyrics - Weird Al Yankovic

So you got dry rot and your water pressure's weak 

Your trash compactor's broke, the roof has sprung a leak 

You just found out your toilet's overflowed 

And your smoke detector's smoking and your heater's gonna explode 

But 

I'll repair for you (when the roof starts to fall) 

I'll repair for you (all the cracks in your wall) 

I'll repair for you (every nail, bolt and screw) 

Your washer's busted and your faucet drips all night 

You got some termites with a healthy appetite 

Well have no fear, I'll patch up every hole 

And I'm licensed and I'm bonded, even se habla espanol 

So 

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I'll repair for you (when your doorknob is loose) 

I'll repair for you (when your plunger's no use) 

I'll repair for you (with a caulk and hot glue) 

I am prepared to tackle all kinds of paste and spackle 

You got a leaky shower, I'll be there in an hour 

With stucco, bricks and plaster, I am a Jedi master 

We'll help you through your crisis 

Check out our low, low prices too, yeah 

Your floors are sagging and your plumbing's shot 

But if you don't mind my hairy butt crack every time that I squat 

Photos 

I'll repair for you, anything that you need 

I'll repair for you, and my word's guaranteed 

I'll repair for you, I'll rewire it too 

I'll repair for you 

I'll repair for you 

I'll repair for you, every nail, bolt and screw