Genius Lyrics - Warren Zevon

I've got a bitter pot of je ne sais quoi 

Guess what, I'm stirring it with a monkey's paw 

Since I saw you coming out of my barber shop 

In that skimpy little halter top 

Did you light the candles? Did you put on "Kind Of Blue" 

Did you use that Ivy League voodoo on him, too? 

He thinks he'll be alright but he doesn't know for sure 

Like every other unindicted co-conspirator 

Mata Hari had a house in France 

Where she worked on all her secret plans 

Men were falling for her sight unseen 

She was a genius 

There's a a face in every window of the songwriters' neighborhood 

Everybody's your best friend when you're doing well, I mean good 

The poet who lived next door when you were young and poor 

Grew up to be a backstabbing entrepreneur 

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Albert Einstein was a ladies' man 

While he was working on his universal plan 

He was making out like Charlie Sheen 

He was a genius 

When you dropped me and you staked your claim 

On a V.I.P. who could make your name 

You latched on to him and I became 

A minor inconvenience 

Your protégé don't care about art 

I'm the one who always told you you were smart 

You broke my heart into smithereens 

And that took genius 

You and the barber make a handsome pair 

Guess what, I never liked the way he cut your hair 

I didn't like the way he turned your head 

But there's nothing I can do or say I haven't done or said 

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Everybody needs a place to stand 

And a method for their schemes and scams 

If I could only get my record clean 

I'd be a genius