When You're Evil Lyrics - Voltaire

When the Devil is too busy 

And death's a bit too much 

They call on me, by name you see, 

For my special touch. 

To the Gentlemen, I'm misfortune 

To the Ladies, I'm surprise 

But call me by any name 

Anyway it's all the same 

I'm the fly in your soup 

I'm the pebble in your shoe 

I'm the pea beneath your bed 

I'm a bump on every head 

I'm the peel on which you slip 

I'm a pin in every hip 

I'm the thorn in your side 

Makes you wriggle and writhe 

And it's so easy when you're evil 

This is the life, you see 

The Devil tips his hat to me 

I do it all because I'm evil 

And I do it all for free 

Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need! 

While there's children to make sad 

While there's candy to be had 

While there's pockets left to pick 

While there's grannies left to trip 

down the stairs, I'll be there, I'll be waiting 'round the corner 

It's a game, I'm glad I'm in it 

'Cause there's one born every minute 

And it's so easy when you're evil 

This is the life, you see 

The Devil tips his hat to me 

I do it all because I'm evil 

And I do it all for free 

Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need 

I pledge my allegiance to all things dark 

and I promise on my damned soul 

To do as I am told, Lord Beelzebub 

Has never seen a soldier quite like me 

Not only does his job, but does it happily. 

I'm the fear that keeps you wake 

I'm the shadows on the wall 

I'm the monsters they become 

I'm the nightmare in your skull 

I'm a dagger in your back 

An extra turn upon the rack 

I'm the quivering of your heart 

A stabbing pain, a sudden start. 

And it's so easy when you're evil 

This is the life, you see 

The Devil tips his hat to me 

I do it all because I'm evil 

And I do it all for free 

Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need 

And I do it all for free 

Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need 

And I do it all for free 

Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need 

It gets so lonely being evil 

What I'd do to see a smile 

Even for a little while 

And no one loves you when you're evil 

I'm lying though my teeth! 

Your tears are all the company I need