Unidentified Friend Lyrics - Town Pants

When I woke up I was just like you 

But in today's paper on page 22 

I'm right there for all to see me in my entirety 

No longer will I live in relative obscurity 

You know the famous girl I'm with from movies and TV 

The blurry guy beside her is obviously me 

Look a little closer behind and to the right 

Now everybody knows that I was out with her that night 

and now my time has come 

I've got the world on the run 

my problems have come to an end 

I'm an unidentified friend 

unidentified friend 

Fame and fortune's bound to come how will I spend it all 

My fans will mob me when I go to the mall 

Dark glasses and a hat should be first things that I buy 

Or will my fans see through that - maybe I won't try 

I'll give you my unlisted number pager number too 

But when I'm on a movie set my agent will take care of you 

I'll be on all the talk shows, and game shows galore 

I'll even go to parties with Charro and Zsa Zsa Gabor 

I just can't understand it not a single call 

I've waited by the phone for days and it hasn't rung at all 

Except for my landlord who says I'm overdue 

The bills keep stacking up what am I gonna do? 

Could it be they didn't see my picture after all? 

would they run it again I'll give them a call 

And while I'm at it I'll call my famous friend 

Maybe she'd hang out with me then the wait would end