Cocktales Lyrics - Too $hort

Cause these are the tales, the Freaky Tales 

These are the Tales that I cherrish so well 

You don't like my dirty rap, you can go to hell 

Cause Short Dog's on the mic spittin Cocktales 

H-E-A-D 

All you washed up hoes tryin to throw that P 

You're just a big freak, you better not complain 

When you hear these cocktails and you hear your name 

If you a fake bitch, ain't no thing 

I'll pick up the phone and call Janine 

If I call Marie, I know for a fact 

I'm gettin fucked in my drop top cadillac 

I met this freak named Naomi 

Straight dick sucker worked me and my homies 

She had a girlfriend, her name was Vicki 

I pulled her to the side and let her suck my dick 

She was fine as fuck, but can't fuck with Tina 

Tina, Tina, the sperm cleana 

I took her to my house and told her strip 

Baby got freaky-started doing the splits 

I said, "BitchDo what you want 

Cause this true blue mack won't even front" 

I fucked her with my finger, she tried to cum 

Pussy so tight, it wouldn't give me none 

I'm Too $hort baby couldn't be no punk 

I'm trying to get freaky cause I love the funk 

My dick is big and her nigga had a little one 

I didn't fuck her freaky ass, but it was still fun 

I know you stop and wonder just what it is 

It's the California lifestyle that I live 

My name is Short, my game is long 

I freak these hoes and sing these songs 

I know this girl named Annette 

Get her all alone and she'll suck your dick 

Hella freaky won't say no for shit 

You and her all alone, nigga that's your bitch 

I know another freak her name's Joanne 

I always get the pussy 'cause I know I can 

Finest bitch around, ain't got no man 

Everytime she cross my mind I go fuck her again 

She's like another bitch named Christine 

Bitch so dumb, I named her misdemeanor 

'Cause it had to be a crime to be that dumb 

I took her to my house and she let me cum in her mouth 

You know I did all that shit 

She got my number, if she beep me, I'm gonna call that bitch 

And go dig in them guts like a gardener 

If she starts screamin', I'm gonna fuck the bitch harder 

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Cause these are the tales, the freaky tales 

These are the tales I tell so well 

You don't like my dirty rap you can go to hell 

'Cause Short Dogg's on the mike tellin' cocktails 

I meet the groupies, hookers like Kathy 

Fucking M.C.'s cause she's so nasty 

See her backstage trying to throw that ass 

She just like the freaks and she had to pass me that pussy 

You can't stop the bitch 

Let her roll on my rolls then I drop the bitch 

My name is Short my game is long 

I freak these hoes and sing these songs 

I know another girl named Stephanie 

Do anything she can to have sex with me 

She really don't bring out the best in me 

But I love her fine ass laying next to me 

She's like another freak named Nicole 

So damn sprung on my diamonds and gold 

I took her to my house, she gave me the panties 

I fucked her so good she told her friend named Angie 

Angie called me up about two weeks later 

Talking some shit about do me player 

So I did her just like Tamara 

Taking naked pictures with my poloroid camera 

Next they told a girl named Rocquelle 

Got my skin all under her fingernails 

She was diggin in my back while I grind the shit 

That was way back now I can't find the bitch 

But if I do, I'll probably do the same again 

Break the bitch for everything 'cause I came to pimp 

I'm Too Short baby, I don't stop mackin 

I grab the microphone and I don't stop rappin 

You can bet your life as I spit these raps 

I'll be fucking em' up like that BITCH 

I know another trick her name was Shery 

I had to cut her loose 'cause she wanted to get married 

Pussy so good and I do mean very 

SOmetimes it's shaved and sometimes it's hairy 

I'm Short Dogg ain't nothing nice 

You ever make me mad and I'll fuck your wife 

Have fun with your bitch and have her sprung on my dick 

I guess I'll pull it out and just cum on your bitch 

Like my other little tramp named Erika 

ANywhere I want to fuck that's where I fuck 

'Cause she's the freakiest bitch in America 

Everytime I get the pussy I just tear it up 

Photos 

'Cause these are the tales the freaky tales 

These are the tales that I tell so well 

You don't like my dirty raps you can go to hell 

'Cause Short Dogg is on the mike telling cocktales