Gerbil Lyrics - Stephen Lynch

(Verse 1) 

I bought a gerbil at the petting zoo 

If Richard Geere can do it i can too 

I get undressed, I start to lube 

I stick the gerbil at the end of the tube 

Wondering just, How he'll feel 

Will he like better than his little wheel 

Careful now, He's right beside me 

One more inch and he's inside me 

(CHORUS) 

GOOOO!! GERBIL GOOOO!! 

Burrow harder, Burrow deeper 

Be my little chimney sweeper 

One thing I forgot about 

How am I supposed to get you out 

(Laughter) 

(Verse 2) 

So now my gerbil's on easy street 

Its warm and cozy and there's plenty to eat 

This situation is beyond my control 

Gotta find away to get him out of his hole 

I try crowbars, I try wires 

I almost hurt him with a pair of pliers 

I try cheese but he's not biting 

I wish this wasn't so exciting 

(CHORUS) 

GOOOO!! GERBIL GOOOO!! 

Jesus i am such a sucker 

Please get out u furry fuOOh! 

I think i am getting ill 

Suddenly, He's very very still 

(Pause) 

(Verse 3) 

Now it's too late my gerbil died 

I guess I have commited, Gerbacide 

Here's some advise, It's pretty clear cut 

If you love your gerbil dont stick him up your butt 

Don't stick him up your butt 

Little furry gerbil in your booty hole 

Don't stick him up your...(mumbles while singing) 

Yeah... 

(Clapping)