The 'r' Machine Lyrics - Sesame Street

Bert (fixing the machine): "Ha! Well, this machine knows what letter comes next. I put this here..." 

Ernie: "Hi there, Bert. What's that machine you're working on?" 

Bert: "Oh hi, Ernie. This is my latest invention, my automatic "R" detector." 

Ernie: "No kidding." 

Bert: "Yeah. Anytime this machine hears an "R" or an "R" word, it rings a bell. I'll start it up for you now...." 

(sound of machine starting) 

Ernie: "Wow! Look at that machine go." 

Bert: "Now if you'll just say something that begins with "R"..." (bell rings) 

Ernie: "What was that?" 

Bert: "Oh, I just said "R". (bell rings) And when you say "R" (bell rings), the bell rings." (bell rings) 

Ernie: "Hey! You said "rings" (bell rings) which begins with "R"." (bell rings) 

Bert: "Right." (bell rings) 

Ernie: "Why, that's remarkable! (bell rings) Hey! (Ernie laughs) Keeheehee! That's fun. Let me tell it an "R" riddle." (bell rings twice) 

Bert: "O.K. Just don't go too fast. I don't know what'll happen if the machine gets going too fast." 

Ernie: "O.K. Listen to this, machine: Roscoe really raised rabbits while Ruth rode the red reindeer. If Roscoe's rabbits raised a racket, why did Ruth's reindeer run the rabbits ragged?" 

(bell rings 17 times) 

Bert: "Hey, hey! Don't talk so fast. The machine is beginning to smoke." 

Ernie: "Well, I only have one last poem here." 

Bert: "Yeah, yeah, but listen.." 

Ernie: "Robert rolled reddish radishes around the ring of rubber rubbish..." (The bell rings seven times and the machine makes a "Moooooooo!" sound) 

(The machine explodes and makes a whistling sound) 

Bert: "Hey, hey, wait! Hold it!....Wait!....Now look what you did!" 

Ernie: "Oh my! The machine looks ruined." 

(The bell rings and the machine makes another whistling sound) 

Bert: "Rats!" 

(The machine pops out a spring)