Dear Penthouse Lyrics - Rodney Carrington

Dear Penthouse 

Rodney Carrington 

Dear Penthouse: Im a freshman at a small Midwestern university 

And I never thought something like this could happen to me 

When my teacher with the dynamite ass, asked me to stay after class 

And she started to undress 

I cant forget the statement she made 

If you drop you pants Ill raise your grade 

(Girl) Dear Penthouse: I never thought those letters were true until 

I was on a fishing trip and I met a girl named Jill 

We had a little too much to drink 

I couldnt believe what I was starting to think 

So we headed to her tent, theres nothing like eating out 

Though the next morning my mouth still smelled like trout 

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Chorus 

Ive read every issue since 1974 

The first two years behind the bathroom door 

I poured through every Penthouse I could find 

Even though my mom said Id go blind 

Dear Penthouse: Im a seaman first class at an overseas naval base 

Its been seven long months since Ive seen a womans face 

When I saw your recent issue, I took a box of Kleenex tissue 

And I locked the barracks door 

Thanks to you Ive gotten a grip, please excuse my jerky penmanship 

Chorus 

Dear Penthouse: Doing sports on the radio has always been my job 

Ive never wanted a man until I noticed BOB 

When were close I start to perspire 

His little buns set my loins on fire 

And I dream about the day hell say, Chick lets get undressed 

Name and address held upon request 

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