Happiness Hotel Lyrics - Muppets

Oh, there's no fire in the fireplace 

There's no carpet on the floor 

Don't try to order dinner 

There's no kitchen anymore 

But if the road's been kinda bumpy 

And you need to rest a spell 

Well, welcome home to Happiness Hotel 

If you've got luggage keep it handy 

But you're running out of luck 

'Cause the bellhops ain't to organized 

And the elevator's stuck 

Still if you don't mind friendly animals 

And can learn to stand the smell 

Well, welcome home to Happiness Hotel 

Welcome home 

Oh, welcome home 

No matter where you wander 

You will never do as well 

Okay the lobby's looking shabby 

And it's got the wrong address 

And the whole dern thing has been condemned by 'Merican Express 

Still the management is cheerful though the whole joint's gone to hell 

Well welcome home to Happiness Hotel 

Oh there are bugs 

There are bugs 

And there are lice 

There are lice 

Sure we have our little problems 

But you'll never beat the price 

You've got every kind of critter 

You've got ev'ry kind of pest 

But we treat 'em all as equals 

Jes' like any other guest 

Though you're cleaner than the others 

Still as far as we can tell 

You'll fit right in to Happiness Hotel 

We'd fit right in to Happiness Hotel