Fat Bastard Lyrics - Macc Lads

He'll eat your pies, he'll tell you lies, 

You wouldn't believe that fat bastard's size 

His massive gut is forty foot, it goes dark when he walks in the pub 

His buttocks part, you'll smell his farts, 

He's so fat, he can't wipe his own arse. 

So now you've heard about the ugly turd, 

He's a virgin and he's never had a bird 

Does anyone know he's gay? He goes round spreading AIDs. 

(We haven't got a clue where the fat fucker is) 

Has anyone seen him eat? He's never seen his feet. 

The fat bastard. 

Five hundred pounds, he's very round, 

But he gets taller when he lies on the ground 

He busts his flies, but he can't hide, 

Coz he's too big, too fat and too fucking wide 

Can anyone guess his weight? That was his fourteenth plate 

(We haven't got a clue where the fat fucker is) 

His backside blubbers about, cleavage peeping out 

The fat bastard