Waitret, Please, Waitret Lyrics - Kinky Friedman

(kinky friedman, major boles, roscoe west) 

Well, I pulled into dallat on a cold december day 

Bought coffee and a doughnut at the greasy spoon caf, 

Spied me a pretty young waitret standing by her tray, 

But she couldn't believe her sweet young ears when the waitret heard me say: 

Oh, waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate, 

Eatin' ain't cheatin', lord it ain't no disgrace. 

Oh, bring me a lone star, make it a case 

And waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate. 

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Well, I walked up to the jukebox feeling kind of mean, 

The waitret said, hey, stupid, that's a cigarette machine! 

well, look-a here, young waitret, would you care to make a bet, 

And if that there ain't a jukebox, you can smoke my cigarette! 

Oh, waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate, 

Eatin' ain't cheatin', lord it ain't no disgrace. 

Oh, bring me a lone star, make it a case 

And waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate. 

You're the prettiest thing in dallat, is dallat your home ? 

No, I come all the way from houton and I feel so all alone. 

I used to live in autin then I come up to big d 

In hopes to get my big break on national tv. 

Honey, I think I have what it takes to make you a star but first ... 

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Oh, waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate, 

Eatin' ain't cheatin', lord it ain't no disgrace. 

Oh, bring me a lone star, make it a case 

And waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate.