Heavyweight Lyrics - Kenny Price

So I stepped up for the weighin' I knew the scales were wrong 

Cause you know how them drugstore scales get stepped on all day long 

A little fortune card came out it bears upon my mind 

There was no fortune all it said but just one at a time 

Because when I'm a heavyweight I'm fine when I'm fine 

I got a suit for every weight up to size fifty-nine 

I always wanted to waterski I finally got up this year 

Two iron boards and toe chain and I came right out of there 

People wonder how I laugh at things that make 'em frown 

And how I keep my double chin from a draggin' on the ground 

I guess the folks are curious ask where I get to drive 

But I can go to distance with any girl alive 

Because honey I'm a heavyweight I'm fine if you are mine 

You won't get cold in the winter and I'm a shade in summertime 

One gets lonely two's companions three's a crowd they say 

But I won't fuss if you bring the bus and load the darlings by today 

Someday I'll have to hangin' up and underfeet the heavyweight 

I'll never make the weighin' for a million dollare gate 

I'm a suckin' it to you puny lads you better stay out of my way 

And maybe next year you might be able to prove a little weigh your way 

Cause when I'm a heavyweight I was fine sixty-nine 

And that's not my suit size buddy just the year I left behind 

But when they try to put me down six feet under the ground 

There ain't no way to cover up the round mound of sound 

No there ain't no way to cover up the round mound of sound