She Got The Goldmine (i Got The Shaft) Lyrics - The Essential Jerry Reed - Jerry Reed

Well, I guess it was back in sixty-three 

When eatin' my cookin' got the better of me 

So I asked this little girl I was goin' with 

To be my wife 

Well, she said she would 

So I said, "I do" 

But I'd-a said "I wouldn't" if I'd-a just knew 

How sayin' "I do" was gonna screw up all my o' my life 

Well, the first few years weren't all that bad 

I'll never forget the good times we had 

'Cause I'm reminded every month 

When I send her the child support 

Well, it wasn't too long till the lust was gone 

And I'll admit I wasn't too surprised 

The day I come home and found my suitcase 

Sittin' out on the porch 

Well, I tried to get in, she'd changed the lock 

Then I found this note stuck on the mailbox 

It said, "Goodbye, turkey....... 

My Attorney will be in touch" 

So I decided right then and there 

I was gonna do what's right, 

Give her her fair share, but, brother, 

I didn't assay it was gonna be that much 

She got the goldmine (She got the goldmine) 

I got the shaft (I got the shaft) 

They split it right down the middle 

And then they gave her the better half 

Well it all sounds sort o' funny 

But it hurts too much to laugh 

She got the goldmine 

And I got the shaft 

Now listen, you ain't heard nothin' yet 

Why, they gave her the colour television set 

Then they gave her the house 

The kids and both o' the cars 

See, well then they start talkin' 'bout child support 

Alimony and the cost o' the Court 

It didn't take me long to figure out 

How fond of attorneys I was 

I'm tellin' ya they have made a mistake 

'Cause it adds up to more than this cowboy makes 

Besides, everything I ever had worth takin' 

They've already took! 

While she's livin' like a queen on alimony 

I'm workin' two shifts, 

Eatin' baloney, askin' myself 

"Why didn't you just learn to cook?" 

They give her the goldmine (She got the goldmine) 

They give me the shaft (I got the shaft) 

They said they're splittin it all down the middle, 

But she got the better half 

But it all sounds mighty funny 

But it hurts too much to laugh 

She got the goldmine 

I got the shaft 

Well, she got the goldmine (She got the goldmine) 

I got the shaft (I got the shaft) 

They split it all down the middle 

And then they give her the better half 

Well I guess it all sounds funny (Ha-ha-ha-ha) 

Just hurts too much to laugh 

She got the goldmine 

I got the shaft 

Huh-hah, they ain't kiddin' 

I got the shaft 

But I don't have to worry 

About totin' a billfold no more 

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, 

I let my wife tote it 

I'm gonna be carryin' food stamps 

You get it, Judge? 

Ha-ha, that's not funny, huh? 

Contempt of Court? 

What d'ya mean? 

Listen, Judge 

I was just kiddin' 

I mean