Santa's A Fat Bitch Lyrics - Insane Clown Posse

Sleigh bells jingle-ling rin jing jingle-ling 

Horses, horses, horses, horses. 

Sleigh bells jingle-ling ring jing jingle-ling 

Santa Claus suck my balls 

Drunk as hell ringing bells at the malls 

Dancer, Prancer, Dixon, and Qupid 

I'm a get stupid, ha ha ha, eh 

I sat around all night under the chimney 

Holdin' my sack like "gimme gimme" 

I know that he's commin', he's commin' he must 

Lookin' up nothin' but rust, dust. 

Turn on my TV the very next day I see your gettin' payed 

Leadin' the parade I'm that sniper on the buildin' 

Listen to my nine go click, Santas a fat bitch 

[Chorus] 

Santa Claus is a fat bitch 

(Santa Claus is a fat fat bitch) 

Another year and I ain't get shit 

(Another year I ain't get shit) 

If I hear him land on my roof 

(Oh my undertaker) 

I'm a bust your ass in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth 

Yeah I got somethin' to say about St. Nick 

Fuck that hoe he never brought jack shit 

No toys, candy canes, just a lump of coal, 

So I eat it, 'cause there ain't nothin' in the cupboards 

So I'll be quick, quick and brief 

All's I need for Christmas is my two front teeth 

I got my teeth, kicked out my mouth 

I need a few new ones could you help me out 

Should of known I guessed I'd show not a steak 

No kinda gift I didn't get shit 

Some say I was bad but that wasn't it 

It's all because, Santa's a fat bitch 

[Chorus] 

"Oh-ho-ho don't go that way Roudolf that's the ghetto. 

Ho-ho, those boys and girls don't deserve anything." 

(Background:) Slaybells ringling jing jing jingle-ling 

Horses, horses, horses, horses 

Santa Claus, Santa Claus where you been? 

I see you got cookies and milk on your chin 

I guess you had time to collect your ends 

You always been down for your rich friend 

But Roudolf, he don't bring his sleigh my way 

Nuthin but dirt and coal for little J 

I guess you couldn't fit down my chimney shaft 

You need to loose some of that fat ass, eh 

All the little rich boys they gettin payed 

Countin the toys and duckets they made 

Me? I got a little half little chunk of dog shit 

I'm a kill that fat bitch 

[Chorus] 

For the neighborhood Christmas and everything's whack 

Not a creature sturrin' but a fuckin' rat 

I ain't hearin' jingle bells I ain't hearin' nothin' 

Ain't smellin' no turkey sure as hell ain't no stuffin' 

All that I payed, wished and prayed 

That fat motherfucker would swing my way 

Drop off soldiers and rubber balls 

But I woke up and found some crusty old drawers 

Just as I knew it shaft again, and again, and again, and again 

Every year I wake up to the same old shit, house 

There be no sign of the fat bitch 

[Chorus: x2] 

"He's got a fuzzy white beard and a great big smile, 

A bright red hat you can see for a mile, 

A bag full of goodies and a great big grin, 

Here comes Santa Claus again."