Poo-poo In The Prawn Lyrics - Ian Dury & The Blockheads

I took a sudden notion 

To go down to the ocean 

I'd got my sun-tan lotion 

My flippers and my mask 

In proper distribution 

Of fully-formed ablutions 

Formed an ocean of pollution 

In which I daredn't bask 

Some turds were teeny-tiny 

And some were big and shiny 

But they all fucked up the briney 

In which I dipped my toe 

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If you go swimming in the shite-us 

You'll get worse than dermititis 

From the sea of grey detritus 

Where the sewage ebbs and flows 

There's no respite 

From the cess-pit 

No shelter from the pong 

The poor old ocean 

Is full of motions 

Where the hell did we go wrong? 

Like a lamb off to the slaughter 

Pored myself a glass of water 

I failed to spot I'd caught a 

Little creature in my cup 

I was well and truly bolleaux-ed 

From the fires of hell that followed 

T'was the cup of life I'd swallowed 

And it almost did me up 

Photos 

Something coming 

Through the plumbing 

That should not be there at all 

The glass is brimming 

And things are swimming 

And quite frankly, I'm appalled 

I was a very hungry fella 

I defrosted my paella 

Came down with Salmonella 

Three weeks intensive care 

They failed to send technicians in 

To check the air-conditioning 

Which was unfortunately transmissioning 

A case of Legionnaires 

There's a malaise 

In the mayonnaise 

There's a poo-poo in the prawn 

Where we missed them 

In the system 

Little germs are being born 

There's no respite 

From the cess-pit 

There's no shelter from the pong 

Where the hell did we go wrong?