My First Day Lyrics - Haystak

[ Intro ] 

Sometimes I write about something, that like something I went through 

Or something my people went through 

And I felt like they needed some motivational shit 

And it usually ends up going something like this... 

( Chorus ) 

My first day, without you in my life 

Things felt strange, a bit deranged 

Even so, I hope you're doin okay 

Take it slow, you just never know... ( just never know, oh!) 

Yo, you just never know... nooo (just never know, oh!) 

You just never know... nooo (just never know, oh!) 

( Verse 1 ) 

My systems caught in conniption, stomach in knots 

Feedin for my medicine, overcoming addiction 

The first step is quittin, nah the first steps admittin 

I got a problem, I need help, this is something I can't beat myself 

I almost felt like I can't be cured 

Rehab won't take me cuz I ain't insured 

Layin in the bath tub, shakin like a new born 

Searchin for the courage it'll take for me to move on 

I've been livin life like this way too long 

Beggin God please, bring me home 

I stopped before, three or four days 

Always end up back in the same place 

People call me a junkie, dope fiend 

How they gonna judge me, they don't even know me 

Lights off, wanna be left alone, I'm tryin to enjoy the methodone 

Put a Jimi Hendrix record on, and excuse me while I kiss the sky 

Dosed off, woke up, sick to my stomach, ran to the bathroom 

Started to vomit, the methodone wore off and the withdrawal started 

That first day was the hardest... 

( Chorus ) 

( Verse 2 ) 

Stayed strong, endured the rough weather 

I ain't fully recovered but I'm doin much better 

I can keep my food down to shakes and calms 

They lowerin the doses of methodone 

I eat V's and blow lots of dro 

It's like chewin gum when you're tryin not to smoke 

Keep my mind occupied, calm my nerves 

It's not the same high, deep inside I... 

Just want one more but I can't turn back this week for it 

But I done made it, almost a month 

With just a couple of V's and I blew some blunts 

But that weed and gonna make me OD 

That other shit was gonna kill me 

Six weeks, and everything seem so clear 

Before I knew it, time flew and I was clean for a year 

Can't believe something started off socially 

Something I almost allowed to take over me 

Days went by and it was sixteen months 

And I swear to God I didn't fall off once 

I, feel like a brand new guy and I'm definetly livin a brand new life 

Some days I still resist the thirst but none's worst than the first (believe 

that) 

( Chorus ) 

( Verse 3 ) 

Two years and I ain't touched it 

Got a lot done, I been so productive 

Rebuilt, I was so constructive 

Can't believe I was so self destructive 

Got a good job and I make big bucks 

Went to the lot and got a new pick up 

Got a brand new crib and a brand new kid 

I think anybody can quit if I did 

If you wanna quit, get up and go get the shit 

Walk straight to the toilet, drop it, flush it, fuck it, fight it 

Just resist it and if this helps then just keep listenin 

When you start slippin I'll send you another one 

Sonny, wasup?, we just saved another one 

I know it's so hard like there's no God 

But through him you're able to go so far 

Hey, I don't wanna sound corny 

I'm just like you either hungry or horny 

Seems as though we get hooked so easily 

Quitting becomes an impossibility 

I ain't sayin treat your body like a church 

Just don't let dope put your body in a hearse 

The streets inside you, you just gotta search 

And know that no day be harder than the first 

( Chorus ) 

[ Outro ] 

Yo, all my people, goin through they thing 

Whatever they thing may be 

Just know, God got his hands on you 

And he'll grant you the serenity 

To change the things you can't 

And you can change that, aight 

Hold me down and I'ma hold you down... one