Murder By Numbers Lyrics - Frank Zappa

Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals) 

Ike Willis (guitar, vocals) 

Mike Keneally (guitar, synthesizer, vocals) 

Bobby Martin (keyboards, vocals) 

Ed Mann (percussion) 

Walt Fowler (trumpet) 

Bruce Fowler (trombone) 

Paul Carman (alto saxophone) 

Albert Wing (tenor saxophone) 

Kurt McGettrick (baritone saxophone) 

Scott Thunes (bass) 

Chad Wackerman (drums) 

Eric Buxton (vocals) 

Mr. Sting (vocals) 

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Performance by Sting 

How'd he get in the show? 

Sting & Andy Summers) 

Alright . . . Now, 

this afternoon on my way down the elevator 

we stopped at the lobby, 

and I wasduced to a man 

named Sting who I'd never met before. 

And, he's a very nice man, 

and he came to the show tonight 

and I just talked to him in the dressing room 

a little while ago and I said: 

"How would you, Mr. Sting, 

like to come up on stage and perform with us?" 

Now . . . 

Photos 

How's [...] . It's not in my nature to 

kick a man when he's down. 

When I saw the first part of the show 

I realised I had to come up here and tell you something. 

Well, four years ago Jimmy Swaggart said this about me: 

He said this here song by The Police, 

Performed by the sons of SATAN! BEELZEBUB! 

LUCIFER! THE HORNED ONE! 

I wrote the fuckin' song, alright? 

Once that you've decided on a killing 

First you make a stone of your heart 

If you find that your hands are still willing 

Then you can turn a murder into art 

There really isn't any need for bloodshed 

You just do it with a little more finesse 

If you can slip a tablet into someone's coffee 

Then it avoids an awful lot of mess because 

It's murder by numbers one two three 

It's as easy to learn as your ABC 

Murder by numbers one two three 

It's as easy to learn as your ABC 

Now if you have a taste for this experience 

And you're flushed with your very first success 

Then you must try a twosome or a threesome 

And you'll find your conscience bothers you much less 

Because a murder is like anything you take to 

It's a habit-forming need for more and more 

You can bump off every member of your family 

And anybody else you find a bore 

Because it's murder by numbers one two three 

It's as easy to learn as your ABC 

Murder by numbers one two three 

It's as easy to learn as your ABC 

I said murder by numbers one two three 

It's as easy to learn as your ABC 

Murder by numbers one two three 

It's as easy to learn as your ABC 

Murder by numbers A B C D E 

Mr. Sting! Ladies and gentlemen . . . Mr. Sting! 

Sting! 

Thank you! "Murder By Numbers" . . . And then, suddenly