The Mexican Scotsman Lyrics - Enter The Haggis

Jose, get your bagpipes 

And head down to the square 

Seranade the passers-bye 

And you'll make some money there 

Jose came to this country 

Looking for a chance 

To make some decent money 

To buy a pair of pants 

But we were in recession 

And jobs were far and few 

So jose took his bagpipes 

And did what he had to do 

Dressed in his Sombrero and Kilt 

With his bagpipes and maracas 

Playing away for his supper 

Boiled haggis with nachos 

One day while he was basking 

A pretty young lassie came by 

She said "Jose, take s troll with me" 

Says Jose, "Si! Si! Och' 'Aye!" 

They spent the day together 

Then she took him to a dance 

Well, Jose moved most gracefully 

'Cause he wasn't wearing pants 

And he was born in Mexico City 

Educated in Scotland 

In sandals and bright tartan pancho 

Jose's fashion statement was not planned 

But when Jose went to the men's room 

There was trouble close at hand 

Cause in came Bob, the sailor man 

The roughest man in the land 

Says Bob, "You're lookin' pretty 

In your little tartan dress 

Now you'd best be off to the ladies room 

'fore I pummels you into a mess" 

Now you could have heard a pin drop 

As Jose tongued around 

His scottish-mexican blood began to boil 

And it made this kind of sound... 

And when it all was over 

Sailor Bob lay on the floor 

He looked the saddest sorry wreck 

Ever blown a shore 

Now, the sailors keep a lookout 

Whenever they're on the land 

For they knows well that they doesn't mess 

With a Scottish Mexican man!