The Ugliest Man In Town Lyrics - Dr. Hook

Now handsome guys get girls that are pretty 

Other guys get 'em 'cos they're clever and witty 

But the only love I ever get, I get out of pity 

'Cos I'm the ugliest man in town 

I drive down the road in a Rolls Royce car 

Use hundred dollar bills when I light my cigar 

But still you know, that won't get you very far 

When you're the ugliest man in town 

There was a note on the doorstep where I was found 

It said this sweet child weighs eleven pounds 

So bring him up healthy and wealthy and stout 

Keep his back to the light, don't let it turn around 

Yeah all you women you're heartless and cold 

All you want is my silver and gold 

And don't you know that there's a beautiful soul 

Inside the ugliest man in town 

[Boy do I got plans for us] 

Yeah I'm so ugly I shave in the dark 

Kids start to cry when I walk through the park 

Clocks stop ticking and dogs start to bark 

Whenever I come around 

Yeah I walk down the street and the girls all hiss me 

If I die tomorrow not one of them would miss me 

Only reason they ball me is they can't stand to kiss me 

I'm the ugliest man in town 

Yeah I'm the ugliest man in town 

[You know a guy as ugly as you man could use a manager. 

You know what I mean? Just sign this small piece of paper 

here man. You can give me a couple of bucks a week, a couple 

of free meals man. I'll take you all over the world. We'll 

go to Japan baby, they'll love you over there baby. 

They'll make another monster movie with you hahahaha] 

(c) Unknown