Juanita Lyrics - David Allan Coe

Well I'm finally gettin' used to the water 

The way the tarantulas bite 

Those federals didn't believe 

I only came here to watch the bulls fight 

Tell my mother, "I need a good lawyer" 

Tell my father, "I'm getting a tan" 

My sleepy siesta down south of the border 

Is taking more time than I planned 

Oh Juanita somebody betrayed me 

They've given me ten years to life 

Juanita I need you to save me 

I promise I'll make you my wife 

I got a big house in Milwaukee 

With a color TV and a pool 

A Naugahyde bar and a Cadillac car 

Juanita they're waiting for you 

Tie the burro up down in the courtyard 

To keep the guard busy tonight 

When you bring my dinner make sure the tortilla 

Is filled with a gun or a knife 

Hey Juanita somebody betrayed me 

They've given me ten years to life 

Juanita I need you to save me 

I promise I'll make you my wife 

Juanita you'll love Wisconsin 

Wisconsin is gonna love you 

Yes, all of Milwaukee speaks Spanish 

Of course you're gonna wear American shoes 

Lake Michigan tastes like tequila 

Frijoles why they grow there on trees 

You can say adios to the pigs and the goats 

If you'll just do this one thing for me 

But Juanita somebody betrayed me 

They've given me ten years to life 

Juanita I need you to save me 

I promise I'll make you my wife 

Juanita, I, I swear it was all a mistake 

You see I was drowning out there in the ocean 

And I saw this bale coming by man 

So I grabbed it and I climbed up on top of it 

And I found this stick and I rowed myself into shore 

And when I got there 

The border patrol was waiting for me 

At the I didn't know what it was 

I promise you if you'll just marry me 

So I can become a citizen of Mexico 

I'll take you to Milwaukee 

You can meet all my friends 

They got these big shiny motorcycles 

And you can ride on the back of 'em with 'em 

Really, Juanita would I lie to you?