Did I Shave My Back For This? Lyrics - Cledus T. Judd

A mason jar full of shine, a CD of Leann Rhimes 

Is what I bought for our anniversary tonight 

Now here I stand with my petunias in hand 

And you've got a headache again 

I hit a yard sale, cut my toenails 

Trimmed my nose hairs just right 

I thought you'd be impressed by my new hunting vest 

But there's no chance tonight 

It ain't the first time this year, it'll be the TV and beer 

I about forgot what's its like to be here 

As I sleep on the floor while she sniffles and snores 

Did I shave my back for this? 

Oh man, aww woo 

This things duller than a dag burn butter knife 

Now I'll bet she'll regret the fact that she didn't let 

Me take her to that motel with a pool 

You know its so hard to find free HBO and Showtime 

And them vibrating beds sure are cool 

I souped up the RV, fired up my flobee 

Trimmed my toupee just right 

I tried self tanning cream, it turned my skin green 

Uh, you know the directions, uh, said that it might 

Well its a mystery to me, why she don't like Cledus T. 

Most find me hard to resist, I'm wearing my brand new drawers 

And wondering what the heck for did I shave my back for this? 

Deanna, did I shave my back for this? Ohh ohh ohh