Mr. Mistoffolees Lyrics - Cats

The Rum Tum Tugger calls in "Mr. Mistoffolees," the original 

"conjuring cat" to use his magical powers to bring back their 

leader. Mistoffolees succeeds in getting back all of the lights, 

relocating Old Deuteronomy, and showing off his magic tricks, 

including his infamous "conjuring turn." 

SOLO: 

You ought to ask Mr. Mistoffolees! 

The original conjuring cat 

The greatest magicians have something to learn 

From Mister Mistoffolees' conjuring turn 

And you'll all say 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

He is quiet, he is small, he is black 

From the ears to the tip of his tail 

He can creep through the tiniest crack 

He can walk on the narrowest rail 

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He can pick any card from a pack 

He is equally cunning with dice 

He is always deceiving you into believing 

That he's only hunting for mice 

He can play any trick with a cork 

Or a spoon and a bit of fish paste 

If you look for a knife or a fork 

And you think it is merely misplaced 

You have seen it one moment and then it's gone! 

But you find it next week lying on the lawn 

And we all say 

ALL: 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

And we all say 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

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And we all say 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

And we all say 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

MR. MISTOFFOLEES: 

Well! My manner is vague and aloof 

You would think there was nobody shyer 

But voice has been heard on the roof 

When I was curled up by the fire 

And I've sometimes been heard by the fire 

When I was about on the roof 

At least they all heard that somebody purred 

Which is uncontestable proof of my singular magical powers 

And I've known the family to call me in from the garden for hours 

While I was asleep in the hall 

SOLO: 

And not long ago this phenomenal cat 

Produced seven kittens right out of a hat 

ALL: 

And we all say 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

SOLO: 

And not long ago this phenomenal cat 

Produced seven kittens right out of a hat 

ALL: 

And we all say 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

Oh! Well I never was there ever 

A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees 

SOLO: 

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the magical Mr. Mistoffolees!