Why Is Everybody Always Pickin' On Me? Lyrics - Bloodhound Gang

Why is everybody always pickin' on me? 

The morn' that I was born my old man beat up the doctor 

He clocked the doctor 'cause the doctor said I looked like Chewbacca 

The doctor said sir you're misled sir which infers you mistook me 

I did not mean your lovely wife was shackin' up with a wookie 

What I mean is Wolverine is less hairy than your son 

He's looks like Chewie and Hong Kong Phooey all in one 

(Baba Booey Baba Booey) 

To put it mild your new-born child's completely nutty fu-fu lookin' 

I'd shove him back into the oven until he is done cookin' 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause my fifteen year-old cousin has less acne 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

Ain't brushed them teeth since 1983 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause you got the grooming habits of a chimpanzee 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause you're white but you got a nose like Bill Cosby 

Why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

Always pickin' and rippin' apart poor ol' Jimmy Pop Ali 

I got a schnoz like the 'Cos' but there's a lot more wrong with you 

So back me up Bill 

(Yea and you're ugly too) 

So what if I brush my teeth with a piece of cheddar cheese 

Or where a fish net shirt by Chams with my Sergio Valentia jeans 

And my mirror never lies but it always verifies 

I got more cheese and pepperoni than a homemade pizza pie 

You compare me to a Mon chichi but I don't understand 

Why I'm scorned like I'm deformed like the 

(Elephant Man) 

And yea I took my mom to the prom but hey she asked me first 

But at least this time I didn't find my date in the back of a hearse 

About as popular with the girls with Englebert Humperdink 

And that might be 'cause everybody calls me Shrinky Dink 

I know I'm known as Polaroid I'm not a total retard 

It's cause I'm done in sixty seconds and you'll still want it enlarged 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause ya wore velor flares until the late Eighties 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause you run like a girl and sit down to pee 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause your only school chum was the lunch lady 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

You took your mom to the prom but still got lucky 

Like that episode where Gilligan gets sick of being teased 

And he breaks into the professor's lab and makes some LSD 

Peaks freaks and eats the skipper's brains 

Then beats ginger with coconuts 

As Mr. Howell and Lovey burn alive inside their grass hut 

Oh he'll kill again that Gilligan they he should of let him be 

And like a postal clerk I'll go berserk if you don't stop teasing me 

See the trick is only pick on those that can't do you no harm 

Like the drummer from Def Leppard's only got one arm 

The drummer from Def Leppard's only got one arm 

The drummer from Def Leppard's only got one arm 

The drummer from Def Leppard's only got one arm 

The drummer from Def Leppard's only got one arm 

The drummer from Def Leppard's only got one arm 

The drummer from Def Leppard's only got one arm 

The drummer from Def Leppard's only got one arm 

The drummer from Def Leppard's only got one arm 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause my fifteen year-old cousin has less acne 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

Ain't brushed them teeth since 1983 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause you got the grooming habits of a chimpanzee 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause you're white but you got a nose like Bill Cosby 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause ya wore velor flares until the late Eighties 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause you run like a girl and sit down to pee 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause your only school chum was the lunch lady 

But why's everybody always pickin' on me? 

'Cause no one likes you monkey boy