Property Quiz Lyrics - Beautiful South

All the secrets we have shared 

Have moved to a couple better paired 

So if he impales himself on javelin or spike 

I will try my best to be the perfect lookalike 

And if he wants to be smart 

And enter a property quiz 

Every weed in the garden's mine but the lawnmower's his 

Every weed in the garden's mine but the lawnmower's his 

And if his manhood needs the help of scaffold or even a winch 

I will gladly supplement that extra little inch 

And if it ever reaches tie-break at the property quiz 

If they've got my fingerprints on, they're my tits and fanny not his 

If they've got my fingerprints on, they're my not his 

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Now you've found someone new 

May I watch him do what I used to do 

So if he dies an ugly death or even if he faints 

I'll be there at the window with my face pressed up against 

Maybe I shouted too loud 

Maybe you were blissfully deaf 

But I hope he's a better sport than he was a ref 

I hope he's a better sport than he was a ref 

And if his manhood needs the help of scaffold or even a winch 

I will gladly supplement that extra little inch 

And if it ever reaches tie-break at the property quiz 

If they've got my fingerprints on, they're my tits and fanny not his 

If they've got my fingerprints on, they're my not his 

I hope he likes to fly 

And is a good host to every guest 

'Cause there's less chance of dying in a crash than being bored to death 

Yes there's less chance of dying in a crash than being bored to death 

Photos 

And if his manhood needs the help of scaffold or even a winch 

I will gladly supplement that extra little inch 

And if it ever reaches tie-break at the property quiz 

If they've got my fingerprints on, they're my tits and fanny not his 

If they've got my fingerprints on, they're my not his 

Now you've found someone new