Miss Marmelstein Lyrics - Barbra Streisand

Miss marmelstein! miss marmelstein! miss marmelstein! 

Oh, why is it always miss marmelstein? 

Miss marmelstein? miss marmelstein? 

Other girls get called by their first names right away 

They get cozy intimate ... do you know what I mean? 

Nobody calls me: "hey, baby doll!" 

Or "honey dear" or "sweetie pie" 

Even my first name would be preferable 

Though it's terrible, it might be better: it's yetta! 

Or perhaps my second name that's tessye 

Spells t-e-s-s-y-e! 

But no, no, it's always miss marmelstein! 

You'd think at least miss m. they could try... 

Miss marmelstein! miss marmelstein! 

Miss marmelstein! miss marmelstein! miss marmelstein! 

Oh, I could die! 

I'm a very willing secretary 

Enjoy my work as my employer will corroborate 

Except for one disappointment one fly in the ointment 

It's great I mean simply great 

But the aggravation of my situation 

I might as well get it off my chest 

It's the drum appellation 

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Oh pardon the big words I apply 

But I was an english major at c.c.n.y. 

Drum appellation! 

Well, literally I am persistently addressed 

Persistently, perpetually, continually and inevitably addressed! 

Believe me, it could drive a person positively psychosomatic 

Why is it always miss marmelstein? 

Miss marmelstein? miss marmelstein? 

Other girls get called by their nick names right away 

Slightly naughty or riske 

Do you know what I mean? ha! ha... mmmmmmm! 

Nobody calls me: "koo-chee-koo" or "boobala" or "passion pie" 

Even "hey there babe!" thought not respectable 

Ain't so objectable 

It's kind of crummy but chummy 

Of course if I got married, that would do it 

So, where's the lucky guy? ha... 

Till then it still is miss marmelstein! 

Everyday I get more and more fast 

Miss marmelstein! miss marmelstein! 

Miss marmelstein! miss marmelstein! miss marmelstein! 

Oh... oh... oh...! 

I could bust!