Hey St. Peter Lyrics - Bad Examples

I pulled into Memphis, I could not slow down 

My brakes were gone, I wrecked the car...fire on the ground 

Then my car exploded and the flames licked my chin 

And my life flashed before my eyes like an X-rated film 

Like a poison arrow my soul shot through the sky 

Landed there at heaven's gate, much to my surprise 

And an angel with a halo walked up and said, "Hey, dude! 

Welcome to Heaven...we've got this glass of milk for you." 

(Chorus) 

I said, "Hey St. Peter, won't you open up your gate... 

I hear the Devil calling, now please don't make me late. 

He's got loud guitars, alcohol, cheap Jamaican whores... 

I don't want to stay in Heaven no more." 

Well, Satan came a-running, said, "Hey, that boy is mine!" 

He had a John Hiatt T-Shirt and trouble in his eye 

Then the Devil on Cloud 7 and St. Peter on Cloud 4 

Played a hand of poker, and the winner gets my soul 

Chorus 

Well the last thing I remember, Satan held two Jacks 

And I woke up in the back of a Memphis ambulance 

And I do not know for certain which cards St. Peter held 

So I'm breaking all ten commandments to make sure I go to Hell