Vegemite Lyrics - Amanda Palmer Goes Down Under - Amanda Palmer

You tell me that you love me when I'm lying by your side 

You tell me that I am the only one who understands your troubled mind 

That I am blind to any evil you can do 

And that I love you more than any other girl could ever do 

You love the things that I love: you love art and you love books 

And you love love as much as I do and you love my dirty looks 

And you love me right now 

So how can you love... Vegemite? 

It tastes like sadness 

It tastes like batteries 

It tastes like asses 

I cannot hold a man so close who spreads this cancer on his toast 

It is the Vegemite, my darling, or it's me 

You have to make a fucking choice 

I cannot sit with you at breakfast 

The very smell of it obliterates my senses 

And if that weren't bad enough you also eat the shit for lunch 

Which means we can't spend any time together 

What kind of relationship is that? 

The choice is yours, my heart is in your hands... 

Please wash your hands 

You just ate Vegemite for lunch you selfish bastard 

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It's all about you, isn't it? 

It's just take, take, take, take 

What about me? What about my feelings? 

I'm sorry 

I had this really awful experience when I was six years old 

And our British next door neighbor, Christopher Gill, he was babysitting us 

And he made me eat an entire spoonful of Marmite 

Which is just like Vegemite pretty much except it's even grosser 

He made me eat it by telling me it was chocolate fudge 

And so I swallowed the whole thing and then I had to go to the bathroom and throw up 

And it really traumatized me and I'm sorry I got so emotional, I just... 

Photos 

I love you, and no matter what you eat 

I'll always love you completely 

I might just always leave the room at meal times 

Or refuse to kiss or touch you for a week 

If you insist on putting that foul death paste in your mouth 

You're in my heart, but put yourself inside my shoes 

I have to know, it shouldn't be too hard to choose 

I know it's tearing you apart, but it's the way it has to be 

It is the Vegemite, my darling 

It is the Vegemite, my darling 

Put down the Vegemite, you fucker, or I'll leave