Technical Foul Lyrics - Adam Sandler

Look you've got to understand 

Its just been me and Eleanor for sixty-seven years 

So she gets nervous around strangers 

I wouldn't show that picture to any one 

Or they might try to take you two guys back to the laboratory 

Listen we got rules in this house, and you better follow 

Them or you'll find yourself outta of here 

This might be harder then I thought 

If you're coming from street, with dirty shoes on your feet 

That's a technical foul 

If you switch the radio to some modern music show 

That's a technical foul 

If you don't shut the door after using the refridgerator 

That's a technical foul, a technical foul 

If you touch the thermostat, you'll get hit with a bat 

'Cause tha'ts a technical foul, you'll feel my wrath 

If your hair clogs the drain, you'll know the meaning of pain 

Cause that's a technical foul, Ill show you no mercy 

This is such bull shit, hey in this house we say bull spit 

Or its a technical foul, a technical foul 

Let me get this straight 

You expect me to change my entire lifestyle in one night 

Because you guys are a couple of psychotic control freaks 

You got it bub or you can go rot in the gutter 

It's up to you Yankee Doodle 

Well, I don't want to do that 

But let me run a few questions by you 

So I don't screw up accidentally 

If I don't spray Lysol, after moving a bowel 

That's a technical foul, okay? 

If I decide to wash my ass with your monogrammed towel 

That's a technical foul 

Please say, hiney 

If I make fun of your crazy feeties 

Or give sugar cookies to Miss Diabetes 

That's not really technical foul, but possibly a homicide 

Can I sleep past three? 

If you do you'll get a T 

Take a whizz in those flowers 

I'll say hit the showers 

Use this horn as a bong 

Adios Tommy Chong 

Make some long distance calls 

You'll get a kick in the balls 

Can I walk around with my morning erection? 

If you want an automatic ejection 

'Cause that's a technical foul 

But I'd like to see it anyway, just kidding 

There are certain rules which apply in one's life 

With your sister, friends or imaginary wife 

I cant believe, I haven't killed myself 

Respect carries over me on the court 

Here with Wigs McGee, and a fury elf 

Whether you're Jewish diabetic or especially short 

Shes ironic and hes a troll 

I see, shes strange in my royal carry 

My imaginary wife is short and hairy 

They took my wig, I remember the look in their eyes 

How did my life get stuck in this shit hole? 

Why oh why won't someone retrieve my wig, wig, wig? 

Guess I have to deal with your demands 

But please don't touch me with your alien hands 

I got no right to growl 

The whistle she's on the prowl 

Without my wig, I look like an owl 

Oh, my God, don't laugh at her 

Or it's a technical foul 

Or it's a technical foul 

Or it's a technical foul